В очередной раз заполняя форму DS-160 на американскую визу, не могу не порадоваться наивным вопросам вроде:

Не проститутка ли?

Are you coming to the United States to engage in prostitution or unlawful commercialized vice or have you been engaged in prostitution or procuring prostitutes within the past 10 years?
Yes/No

Людьми не торгуете?

Have you ever committed or conspired to commit a human trafficking offense in the United States or outside the United States?
Yes/No

Тооочно не торгуете???

Have you ever knowingly aided, abetted, assisted or colluded with an individual who has committed, or conspired to commit a severe human trafficking offense in the United States or outside the United States?
Yes/No

Ну может из родных кто торгует?

Are you the spouse, son, or daughter of an individual who has committed or conspired to commit a human trafficking offense in the United States or outside the United States and have you within the last five years, knowingly benefited from the trafficking activities?
Yes/No

Хм, а вы не шпиён?

Do you seek to engage in espionage, sabotage, export control violations, or any other illegal activity while in the United States?
Yes/No

Или может террорист, а?

Do you seek to engage in terrorist activities while in the United States or have you ever engaged in terrorist activities?
Yes/No

А спонсируете других террористов?

Have you ever or do you intend to provide financial assistance or other support to terrorists or terrorist organizations?
Yes/No

Не, ну в террористические организации наверняка входите ведь?

Are you a member or representative of a terrorist organization?
Yes/No

А геноцидом не баловались?

Have you ever ordered, incited, committed, assisted, or otherwise participated in genocide?
Yes/No

Ну, а пытками?

Have you ever committed, ordered, incited, assisted, or otherwise participated in torture?
Yes/No

А из маленьких детишек армию не собирали?

Have you ever engaged in the recruitment or the use of child soldiers?
Yes/No

Насильно аборты девушкам не делали, может силой стерилизовали кого-нибудь?

Have you ever been directly involved in the establishment or enforcement of population controls forcing a woman to undergo an abortion against her free choice or a man or a woman to undergo sterilization against his or her free will?
Yes/No

А органы, органы-то поди насильно у людей вырезали?

Have you ever been directly involved in the coercive transplantation of human organs or bodily tissue?
Yes/No

Да, случалось, несомненно, само собой, иногда, конечно :)